Much has been said about the troubles encountered by our sweet 1980’s generation: underpaid internships, overwhelming feeling of helplessness, unsatisfied dreams of greatness and easy money. If you haven’t noticed yet, it’s THERE, THERE and MOSTLY THERE.
All the previous appear as potential candidates to create a tendency to stand up, unify and protest. But as a matter of fact, even while looking at the small things, we can find some good examples of how our generation is getting screwed in many ways. The following is just a random example that contributes to make our life miserable: The nightmare of ONLINE APPLICATION FORMS!!
Like many of you, naive and full of big expectations for my career, I recently launched a quest for the ideal underpaid job… But the time when you could simply send a paper version of your CV, featuring a gentle letter, is over!! The trend is now to make you fulfil at least
one, two, let’s say three goddamned online applications, before landing an interview. So be prepared, all of you, technologically illiterate people (yes BadMotherFucker I’m referring to you!), cause the era when you gonna need an IT licence to postulate is coming.
How not to fulfill your online application:
First step in this driving-you-nuts game: The Registration. New password, new account… But we all know how it goes: you’re never gonna fulfil the two-hours questionnaire right away. Meaning, two weeks later, finally ready to complete it, you’ll have forgotten the password, with all it includes.
Let’s assume you manage to get your password back without having to create a new account. You’re now facing a 10-pages unfriendly survey where the fun is to fill in a wide number of empty fields. Don’t get too excited! None of the questions are new. Education, language, employment (full description and attributions), references… In short: every single data stated on your cv.
SO, WHY THE FUCK CAN’T YOU SIMPLY SEND IT INSTEAD? Again, you really want the job so you kindly comply, even if it implies you struggling for one hour to find the exact duration of your previous jobs, the numbers and addresses of your employers.
That’s basically what those questionnaires are about, wasting half of your life in the meantime. Not to mention the growing number of silly questions employers feel now entitled to ask their future collaborators. “How would you describe your type of skin, Caucasian, Caribbean, Sub-Saharan African, Asian mixed with other roots?” ”Are you a criminal currently enrolled in a traffic involving drugs or guns?” “Are you suffering from any mental disability that may affect your work?” (Please, do answer “no” here, cause if you don’t a whole new questionnaire will roll out, and we surely don’t want that.)
I shall also add that, at any point in this process, you may wanna try to fraud the system by passing your old cv to the Human Resources Department or to simply cry for help. This does not work let me tell you, as they’ll simply link you back to the homepage of the damned registration website!
Come that glorious moment when you’re about to validate the duly completed page. You click save, hold your breath and…….. and there comes the insolent little red star indicating the section you messed up with. You modify, try to save it again and… again that stupid red star. Don’t get mad at this point. It’s not you. It’s probably a bug of the system (yes, cause the system does bug a lot!) making you at the end lose another quarter.
If you happen to successfully reach the point where you overcome: the password, the filling in, the silly questions, the typing-a-motivation-letter-in-a-ridiculously-small-case AND the invalid field’s situation, please do not, do never… no matter what it takes, press the “previous page” button. All this mess would disappear instantaneously and you would be up to start all over again. True story.
So THIS, my dear friends, this is the future of our employment system. Making me suddenly understand why so many people in this world – me included for what is worst – sadly remain without a job.